so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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