I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
being pregnant is like rehab
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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