i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
