Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
is wine microwaveable?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
