THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
