In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
