woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
