My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
