im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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