Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
He told me they were just razor bumps!
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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