Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
