four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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