just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
