that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
