Christians are straight up FREAKS
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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