The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
