you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
