was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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