I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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