Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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