Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
