she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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