i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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