I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
