could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
