I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Girls should come with a carfax report
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I just want nice things and good sex
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
