I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
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