i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
