I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Randomize
