i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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