Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
