All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
