How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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