his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize