I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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