I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
