I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
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