Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
they're like a gay fantastic four
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
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