he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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