its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize