More tranny stories later!
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
