In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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