the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
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