love makes seman taste better
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize