is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
