I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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