Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
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