ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
