just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
