that's an acceptable place to lick
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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